Blog Posts

Partnering for Excellence Conference

Victory pose. Victory power. What a wonderful conference today in North Carolina. If you are looking for today’s Power Point images, please email me.

You Have Options Program – Anonymous Reporting & Respect

Detective, Carrie Hall was intereviewed on WBUR’s Here and Now program today speaking about theYou Have Options program (YHOP) she directs.

Dear Summer: I’m Sorry and I See You

Dear Summer: Too many pecks on the cheek and not enough eye-contact, savoring and skin. We’ve brushed up against each other for sure. It’s not been total neglect. Before you have to head out and go let’s luxuriate. Books. Iced cream. Lemonade. Sandy feet while holding hands or wet without being raw and cold. Laughing. […]

The “F” Words – Fear & Forgiveness

“If your parent is the bear in the living room, it is biologically impossible to run to that parent when they are either over or under reacting. If your parent is scary you can’t run to them. And you also can’t run away from them because you are a child, you can’t function in the world […]

PTSD, Children & Images

Former foster children are almost twice as likely to suffer from Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) as U.S. war veterans, according to a study released Wednesday by the Harvard Medical School (HMS), the University of Michigan and Casey Family Programs. I saw this important article by Candice N. Plotkin today on a the Attachment and Trauma Network page. […]

Forgetting Isn’t Healing: Lessons from Elie Wiesel ( & Telling & Hearing the Truth

In my college youth, I was quick to want to “get beyond” race. I apologized for what I thought was an unmanly outburst in class. I admonished myself for “not being able to get past it.” I remember him leaning in and asking why I would want to forget. Memory, he said, wasn’t just for […]

Childhood Adversity Makes Us Unhealthy Adults & What We Can Do – Part 2

To read part one of this story, go here: It was in October 2014, and it was a one-hour conversation I had with Lisa Vasile, a nurse practitioner of functional medicine at Visions Healthcare in Needham, MA. We sat by her desk. She didn’t poke or prod my body. She didn’t record my weight, height […]

How Childhood Adversity Makes Us Unhealthy Adults: Part 1

Heidi Aylward spent much of 2015 going to doctor’s appointments for back and joint pain, dizziness, swelling of the legs and feet, high blood pressure, elevated platelets, heart palpitations and extreme fatigue. 2016 isn’t looking much better. She’s worn a heart monitor, had a bone marrow biopsy and continues to have blood work. She holds […]

Rick Hanson: Practical Neuro-Plasticity without a PhD

Oh how I love Rick Hanson. I love how he helps my healing and my parenting. He’s taught me so much about the ABC’s of being human, being compassionate with fear and healing with mindfulness. He has a series of free podcast talks, Being Well, on Soundcloud which are excellent. He combines science, spirituality and […]

Loneliness Licked by Love

Don’t surrender you loneliness so quickly. Let it cut more deep.   Let it ferment and season you as few human or even divine ingredient can.   Something missing in me tonight Has made my eyes so soft,   my voice so tender, my need of God absolutely clear. -Hafiz   Don’t surrender your loneliness […]

Death Address

For the first time in my life I know where my father is. I love having a dead dad. Death is an address he can’t change. In death, my father is no longer homeless, violent, alcholic and unwell. He is no longer wandering the streets. He’s not cold or hungry. He isn’t drunk and baking […]

Trauma-Informed Parenting: What Adoptive & Foster Parents Can Help Teach, Part 2

There are many adults with low ACE scores who parent children with high ACE scores. They are some of the best parents I know. They are often feisty and fierce advocates who tirelessly seek out support, strategies and solutions to make the lives of their children easier and better. The ones I admire most have […]

Trauma-Informed Parenting: What Adoptive & Foster Parents Can Help Teach, Part 1

People sometimes feel bad for adoptive parents. They think maybe our kids say, “You’re not my real parents” on a daily basis and that we go to bed crying each night because we can’t have kids of our “own.”Do they think we had to “settle” for adoption or fostering? Do they worry we feel less than as […]

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